I was watching the season finale of the Bachelorette on Monday night, and wondering about Ali and why she doesn’t have a better stylist or ever brush her hair, and wondering why in the world she didn't choose Chris L, and wondering when I’ll be able to stay in a hut in Bali.

Now, I know this is not the most highbrow form of entertainment,

but it is intriguing nonetheless. (who’s excited for Bachelor Pad?!?!)

I had an epiphany watching that night.

I am having my own personal season of the Bachelorette.

I even have my own audience- all of you readers, of course (all 5 of you...) and some select few who I gave my log in and password to on my dating site, so they can sufficiently weigh in on the matter, as they live in different states and can’t sit next to me while I peruse the many match profiles.

Right now I am still on the group date phase.

I’m in the “communicating” phase with 20 guys!

Some are duds, some are crazy, some I get mixed up with each other, and some totally stand out. Some are on a higher level of communication (meaning that we are actually sending emails, instead of answering prefabricated multiple choice questions.)

Like the show captions, I categorize them in my mind by their profession.

Wayne- Nurse.

Marc- Dentist.

Mitch- IT

I even sent a “nudge” to one of them- basically a cyber flirt-

first impression rose, anyone?

With others, I have hit the “archive” button. This is basically my virtual rose ceremony.

I can just picture Chris Harrison coming into my condo as I’m about to hit the “confirm” button on my computer to archive the last dud... I mean, dude...

“Gentleman... Linda.... This is the final rose...”

(that’s always my favorite part, for some reason.

I love that Chris Harrison says it each time with such gravity and intensity.

I wonder if ever has out-takes for this line,

or if he nails it every time on the first take).

And then -bam- I hit “confirm” and the dud.. er, dude... goes to cyber limbo. (sorry- seen Inception too many times... Have limbo on the brain...too many pop references for you? Welcome to my life).

Chris Harrison- “Linda, take a moment and say your goodbyes.”

This is when I go into the “archived” list, look at the poor schmuck one more time, and actually close the match. This is the cyber-dump.

I feel mean doing it.

I had one guy do it to me only once, and I obsessed all day around what his reasonings were.

But you have to do it.

After all, I’m in it for the right reasons. I’m here to find love. I gave up so much to be here (I mean, a whole $15 a month! Think how many Diet Cokes that could buy me!)

oh how I love Bachelor cliché's

So hopefully we’ll get some one on one dates soon....